I am one of the very few women scientists I know with a male partner who prioritises his career after mine.

That is awesome. I have a similar situation (both careers are virtually identical and thus equally prioritized). I remember talking with female students. (I don't work with students, it was just at some event.) They were hanging on my lips when I talked about having kids and staying in the job. It had never occurred to them that they had that possibility. I felt really good about that - making a difference in the minds of people told by society that their jobs (and lives) are unimportant.